The Day I Almost Died... Really

7.20.12

Remember when I mentioned how I almost died at the Palace of Versailles? No? Well I'll refresh your memory- it was over here.

I've been told that I need to share that story... so here it goes.

 We arrived at the Palace of Versailles just a couple days into our trip but we had already hitchhiked with a guy named Pierre, spent the night homeless in Paris, and stayed in a random girl's five star hotel room. We were on a roll with making quality decisions. I'm surprised we're still alive honestly.
Oh and when I say we, I of course mean Lena. Partner in crime.

I know I'm just the height of traveling style here.

 We were touring the Palace in all of its gloriousness when I looked out the window into the gardens and said, "Hey! You want to camp here tonight?" Lena was obviously on board. And no... camping in the gardens of Versailles is not legal.

 We hiked for about 3 or 4 miles, all the way out to the end of the lake/pond/thing. And then we hiked back into the woods where no one would see us. We were actually on an abandoned carriage road that we became convinced was the spot where Mary Antoinnette met her lover. It could happen.

 We set up camp. And this is where things should have become clear to us that this was a bad idea. Okay... maybe it should have been sooner. See that fishy picnic table cover? That is what we had as a tarp because Serbians have no idea what a tarp is (another story entirely).

 Oh and that? Yea that was our tent. No you are seeing it correctly... it only has three sides. We were supposed to get a real tent from one of our friends, but that fell through so this was all we had. I think you can see what's coming.
We were super excited, and besides the occasional plane that passed over, which Lena thought was a spy plane out to get us, we were fine. That is until 2AM. I woke up and it was storming a storm like no other. We pulled all our stuff inside the "tent" and tried to pull it over us. It broke. And started to flood. I thought we were going to get struck by lightening so I had us squatting on the balls of our feet in our tennis shoes.
Guys, it was bad.
We decided that the only thing we could do is hike out. I had a rain cover for my pack but Lena didn't, so we wrapped the entire broken tent around her pack. I know, I wish I had a picture. So we started our hike back, and we get to the gates and they're locked. We are locked in the gardens of Versailles.
So we sit and wait, and this is where my death almost comes in. I start shaking uncontrollably (obviously the start of hypothermia). Lena get's annoyed that I'm shaking so much and suggests that we start walking. That's what saved me. Lena got pissed.
I wrapped my sleeping bad around myself and we start walking towards another gate. Also locked. We tried climbing over the Palace walls. Obviously that one didn't work. We were giving up hope when finally a little old Indian woman comes out of the gate house and just stares at us. She doesn't speak English, we don't speak French. Guys it was confusing. She starts walking away, and we start to give up again. But then she comes back with a key! A key thank the merciful God in Heaven.

 Then we had to find our way back to the train station at like 5AM. But we finally made it back alive. We seriously sat in that Starbucks for like 2 hours.

This is how we felt afterwards.
And that, blogland, is how I almost died in the Palace of Versailles.